lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Randomize