): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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