Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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