i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
