It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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