Soap is not a condiment
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
