u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
Randomize
