Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
