I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
