Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
