IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
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