8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
