My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
