No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize