Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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