Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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