Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
