well you can't waste a boner
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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