just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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