i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize