We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
