WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize