Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
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