I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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