You're completely useless in the revolution.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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