I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize