Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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