i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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