did you get engaged???
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize