thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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