Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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