She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
