Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
