What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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