Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
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