but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Randomize