google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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