D3 body, D1 cock
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
The dick lei will go down in squad history
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