You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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