I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
