Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
