wrigley field is MILF paradise
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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