I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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