You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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