just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
