I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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