jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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