well I can't set my house on fire every night
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
