I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize