I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize
