Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
